WARNING: This post was written early January

Ahh yes, time make another post, hence the ball sack that was on my face. Take a close look at the sack next time. Does one ball look bigger than the other? Is there another ball in that sack? Is this Moose’s nut sack, could possibly be.

Why do I get the nut sack on my face? . Ok. Let’s talk quality over quantity, yes I may not post a lot, but I give the readers of Icebakes some good quality reading material. For example my blog mate Whitney, I think you should replace his head with a pale of paint, because I’ve watched paint dry before, and that’s not very interesting, it’s like reading paint dry. And Moose, you’re not to far behind, C’mon man.

Let’s get right into it. You know what grinds my gears, well I’ll fuckin tell you what grinds my gears, where’s Speiss? Yes, the handsome young man who didn’t have much to say. But that doesn’t matter, because he is handsome. And to give his spot to Partridge? C’mon man. I can see putting Partridge up for a Halloween theme, or a Christmas theme, but a full time theme, isn’t going to fly. Speiss was responsible for 25% of the hits on this site. Consisting of woman of all ages, married, and single. Todd hasn’t been on the site since Speiss’s picture was taken off. And I generate 10% of the hits with my creative and witty bogs.

And another thing, shoveling, the #1 cause of heart attacks in Winnipeg. I’m sick of it. Nothing like shoveling 78ft of driveway whenever it snows. I need a vacation. Hmmmm, wait a minute, done and done.

Heading to Mayan Rivera with Speiss on Saturday for some fun in the sun. Stroll into Playa de Carmen for the Playa’s ball to play some bitches. Looking forward to hanging by the pool with some eye candy, instead of the eye broccoli I went down with last time!

Story Time:
One evening I was watching this movie called Good Luck Chuck, Starring Dane Cook. It’s about this character named Charlie Logan who has to break the curse that has made him wildly popular with single women: Sleep with Charlie once, and the next man you meet will be your true love.

Not long after watching this movie, I started running into some ex-girls, and/or hearing through friends how well they are doing. Which is good to hear, because I’ve always wished the best for each and every one of them, just as long as it didn’t include me!

Could I be cursed? And who cursed me? Could I really be the gateway to finding someone’s true love? Is good luck Chuck really about me? But with hot woman! Let’s call it Good Luck Goody? Hmmmm. I will sign up on facebook to find out why you cursed me Lisa Pilon. To be continued. This may include some pie!

Now it's time for me to introduce a new segment of my post that would include a list of things I’m to old for. Let’s call it “The Mertlaugh List”


Dancing – I’m too old for that shit.
Playing hockey more than once a week. - I’m too old for that shit.
Drinking 2 nights on the weekend. - I’m too old for that shit.
Moving – Need I say more!
Having back to back sex – Bitch please. Here’s some bus fare, now get the fuck out!

Writing Part 2 has you are reading this blog.